Are you currently dating an older woman or considering doing so? You may be wondering how this will be different to dating a woman the same age or younger than you. In the past, dating an older woman was not as common or as socially acceptable. However, times have changed. Many more people do not have the same boundaries with regards to age and as a result, many people are happily dating older women. Many people regard age as just a number as it’s the personality that counts the most.
Dating an older woman can offer several advantages. For example, they may have significantly more life experience than someone younger. As a result, they can be more certain about who they are and what they want. They also may have a maturity and depth of character that younger girls may lack. They may be able to offer more in a relationship, too, in terms of being a supportive partner or maturity.
If you are dating an older woman or are thinking of doing so, there are certain things you should take into consideration. Dating an older woman may be perfect for some people but not suitable for others. It all comes down to personal preference. Here are the top 8 things you ought to consider when it comes to dating an older woman.
Dating an older woman Consideration 1. They may be looking for a serious relationship
The vast majority of women believe in marriage and becoming ready for marriage is usually a process that occurs over time. Often, as women get older and progress through life, they will start to think about marriage more seriously. They may even seek to start a family. Perhaps they’ve done enough exploring during their youth and have achieved many of their personal goals. Therefore, they become ready to make a serious commitment and settle down. It’s far more likely that a 30 something year old will be seeking marriage compared to a woman in her early 20s.
When it comes to dating an older woman, it could be that they are at a point in their life where they are looking to settle down. This is not always the case, obviously. However, remember that they may have had several years more of life and dating experience compared to you. Therefore, it is more likely they have reached a stage where they are ready for something more serious, such as marriage.
Are the two of you looking for the same things?
The key issue to consider here is whether the two of you are actually seeking similar things. For example, maybe you are looking to date casually and have zero intention of settling down anytime soon. Dating an older woman may be tricky if the two of you having different relationship expectations. If she is looking for someone to marry and start a family with, this is a huge contrast and it’s unlikely to work out as you have such different objectives and timelines.
The reality is that women do have a biological clock when it comes to starting a family. After the age of 35, female fertility declines significantly. Therefore, if you are dating an older woman in the 30 to 35 range who is certain she wants children in the near future, you have to consider whether your plans are compatible. It’s important to be open and honest with each other about what you are both seeking.
Dating an older woman Consideration 2. They may be independent and more experienced than you
Dating an older woman can be exciting and even challenging. Having more life experience than you, they may be very knowledgeable, and you may find this intellectually stimulating. They may be able to offer you wisdom and guidance on aspects of your own life. Furthermore, they may be far more independent and less needy in a relationship. All of these factors can be very attractive to potential suitors. You may find it very enjoyable spending time with someone highly capable that can even teach you a thing or two.
It really comes down to your own preferences. If you are someone who loves learning from others and being around those with more experience than you, you may find dating an older woman ideal. However, if you are someone who likes to always be in charge and call the shots, you may struggle. Perhaps you enjoy relationships where you are more experienced than the person you are dating. Or, you prefer dating women who let you take the lead and are more dependent personality types.
Everyone has different preferences
There’s absolutely no right or wrong when it comes to your type in relationships, however, the reality is that not everyone suits dating an older woman. If you are someone who may potentially feel threatened by a woman who is very independent and potentially more experienced than you, perhaps dating an older woman is not for you.
Dating an older woman Consideration 3. Be prepared for a woman who is more assertive about what she wants
An older woman is far more likely to know what she wants in life and in a relationship compared to a younger woman. Through experience in dating and life in general, we all get a clearer idea of our preferences and what makes us truly happy. We also tend to develop a stronger sense of self and our boundaries. If you’re used to dating younger girls who were accommodating and flexible towards you, be prepared that things may be different with an older woman.
It’s common that when we are young, we are more flexible and adaptable to different people and situations. Younger people are often more open to experimenting and trying new experiences. However, as we get older, we tend to become more fixed in our preferences. If you are dating an older woman, it’s more likely that she will know exactly what she wants and will be less open to adapting to suit you. She already has her life established and knows what she is looking for.
Assertiveness may be very appealing to you
Depending on your personality and what you seek in a partner, an assertive woman may be very attractive to you. It can be a huge upside as they may be upfront about their feelings for you instead of hiding them. Rather than spending time figuring out what she wants, she may simply tell you directly. On the other hand, a woman who regularly voices her needs and preferences may be difficult for you to accept, especially if you are not accustomed to this. You may find it overly blunt or even pushy.
Dating an older woman Consideration 4. Older women may bring less drama
Relationship drama is usually caused by mismatched expectations or misunderstandings, resulting in conflict. Some people enjoy and even thrive off relationship drama. While it’s obviously hard to generalize, younger girls may be more prone to throwing tantrums and kicking up a fuss when they are not happy about something. They may even play games such as giving you the silent treatment or trying to make you jealous.
Older women, on the other hand, likely have more relationship experience, which includes experience in working through conflict and communicating in difficult situations. An older woman who has acquired good communication skills is far more likely to address any problems in a reasonable manner as opposed to going about it in a dramatic way. They’ll probably have learned through experience that the best way to deal with issues is to discuss them in an adult way, rather than causing drama. This, in turn, makes it easier for you to know where you stand.
Related: Dating in your 30s: The Challenges You’ll Face and Top Tips for Success
Dating an older woman Consideration 5. People around you may have mixed reactions
Even nowadays though many people are open to dating older women, you may still be subject to people’s negative judgment and opinions. You may experience people staring at you in public, friends cracking jokes about your age difference or making “cougar” comments. On the other end of the spectrum, you may find family members expressing serious disapproval towards your relationship. This can potentially be stressful for you and the woman you are dating.
At the end of the day, the most important thing is how the two of you feel about each other. If your relationship is strong and you are happy together, you’ll both be looking to protect your relationship. It may be difficult to completely disregard any negative judgment you’ve received, however, if you are able to remain united, it will only make your relationship stronger.
Dating an older woman Consideration 7. They may be looking for fun with no strings attached
While some older women may be looking for commitment and maybe even marriage, others may be the absolute opposite. In some situations, a woman who is a lot older, or has already been married and has kids, may not be seeking commitment at all. Perhaps they are content being single and have a fulfilling life that affords them freedom and fun. This kind of woman seeks no strings attached relationships.
It can be exciting dating a woman like this. As they are so independent and seeking fun, they will want to enjoy good times together and not put any responsibility on you to help them with their lives. They probably don’t involve you with their personal problems or expect too much in terms of moral and emotional support. If you are seeking a long-term partner to settle down with and get married, this kind of woman is not going to be suitable for you. Though you may have a connection on some level, she will not be able to offer you the commitment and security that you desire.
Dating an older woman Consideration 8. They are more likely to be financially secure
While this is not always the case, it’s more likely that an older woman is more established in her career. As a result, they may be more financially stable compared to a much younger woman who may have not even entered the workforce. She may still in the early stages of her career. This can have a significant impact on your relationship if you are dating an older woman who has her finances in check.
An older woman doing well in her career may not need to lean on you financially at all. This may apply to day-to-day things such as going on dates as they may be completely fine with splitting costs. Looking at the bigger picture, they may have good prospects career wise and perhaps even be well ahead of you in terms of owning property or being debt-free. This may be attractive to someone who is still working towards improving their own financial situation and may even be on a tight budget.
They may already be accustomed to finer things than you
Another consideration is that because they may be earning well already, they may be accustomed to finer things and a higher standard of living than, say, a girl who’s fresh out of college. They may not be willing to do things like flatshare or goto hangouts for students as, well, they are used to better already. If you are much further behind them in terms of career and your finances, you may find that you have drastically different preferences and standards of living.
The truth about dating an older woman: If you are truly compatible, the fact that she’s older will simply not matter
At the end of the day, when it comes to a successful relationship, the most important things are compatibility, mutual love and a commitment from both people towards making the relationship work. Yes, there may be some considerations to take when dating an older woman, such as potentially being at different stages of your lives or dealing with negative judgment from other people. However, there’s absolutely no reason why you can’t have a happy and fulfilling relationship with an older woman if you are truly compatible and willing to work through any difficulties you may encounter.
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