How To Do Online Dating Successfully: 5 Top Tips For Success

Share This Article

Whether you’re new to online dating or have been using dating apps for a while, you may be wondering why some people manage to find true love while others struggle to even get dates. As with many things in life, achieving success in any pursuit often requires a positive mental attitude, investment of one’s time and effort. Oh, did we mention that a bit of luck helps, too? If you’ve been wondering how to do online dating successfully, be sure to read the following tips.

How to do online dating successfully Tip 1. Have a positive attitude

Firstly, it’s important to have a positive attitude towards online dating if you are going to give it a try. This means leaving behind any preconceived ideas that online dating is ‘for losers’ or for people who can’t find a date in real life. The reality is that there are all types of people on online dating apps. Some will be nice and normal while others may make you want to run a mile. This is no different to how people are in the ‘real’ world.

Having a positive attitude towards online dating means:

Being open-minded and friendly towards people who seem decent
Showing respect towards the people you encounter
Putting your best self forwards, whether it’s online or in-person
Showing up on time for dates
Giving people a chance even if they may not be your usual type

How to do online dating successfully Tip 2. Have realistic expectations

While it’s true that online dating carries many success stories e.g. people meeting their partners on dating apps, this is simply not true for the majority of users. Many people will use online dating apps for a period of time and go on a bunch of dates with different people. They may end up in relationships with some of their matches. Even though it is becoming more common to meet one’s life partner through online dating, this is not necessarily the norm.

During online dating, it’s important to have realistic expectations. Even if you are looking for a serious relationship, you cannot expect that someone you have matched with and are meeting for the first time will be ‘the one.’ You will be setting yourself up for major disappointment if you hold such high hopes for every match. Sure, it’s understandable that you don’t want timewasters. However, you also need to realize that the process of finding someone truly compatible generally does take time.

Try to remind yourself of the following:

Online dating is a way of meeting people outside your immediate reach
Dates are a way of getting to know someone and seeing if they are compatible with you
Accept that some dates may turn out to be a waste of time
The process of finding someone truly special generally takes time
Putting pressure on yourself during online dating does not help, try to relax and have fun

Related: Why Is Online Dating So Hard?

How to do online dating successfully Tip 3. Pick up on other people’s cues to determine whether it’s a worthwhile investment of your time

Online dating successfully requires being able to pick up on people’s cues to evaluate how interested they really are. Even if you think someone you’ve matched with seems to have a lot of potential, you’ll need to be astute at gauging just how interested they are.

How long does it take them to reply you?

Ideally, you want someone who replies you frequently enough in order for you to feel they are interested, however not so often that you feel put off. If the conversation flows naturally between the two of you, it’s unlikely you’ll need to think about their response time. However, if you find that there are long periods of silence while you are waiting for them to reply, you’ll need to assess whether they are truly that interested.

Are they keen to meet in real life?

The whole point of online dating is to meet people who are interested in a real life relationship. If someone you’ve matched with seems to be happy to chat online but seems avoidant when it comes to meeting up, this is not a good sign. Anyone who is looking for an actual relationship will be up for meeting in real life.

After the first date, how has the relationship progressed?

Online dating requires going on a lot of first dates. It’s the only way to figure out whether the person you’ve matched with online is your type. After the first date, you’ll both have a sense about whether it’s worthwhile meeting again. If it’s clear that either (or both) of you are not particularly keen to meet again, you’re better off moving on.

How to do online dating successfully Tip 4. Be yourself!

Are you deciding what to write on your online dating profile? Or are you preparing for your first date with someone you’ve matched with? Or maybe you’re in the middle of getting to know someone they bring up the topic of what you are ‘looking for.’ Whatever stage of online dating you’re at, it’s crucial to stay true to yourself.

Being yourself involves being honest with what you are trying to achieve during online dating. Whether you’re simply looking to go on a couple of fun dates or find a serious relationship, it’s important to be clear with yourself, as well as other people. If, say, you match with someone who has completely different objectives with online dating, you’re better off staying away. What you want to avoid is dating someone knowing full well it’s not actually what you want.

When chatting or going on dates with people you’ve matched with, don’t shy away from saying how you truly think and feel, especially on important issues. That being said, there’s no need to be overly forceful with your opinion or say anything that may be viewed as offensive. However, it’s important that you are being authentic. There’s no point in pretending to be someone you’re not. Successful relationships require honesty and understanding between two people.

How to do online dating successfully Tip 5. Stay safe and avoid scams

Unfortunately, due to their ease of use, online dating apps have become rife with catfishers and even criminals. If you want to do online dating successfully, you’ll need to always keep your wits about you. It’s important to not give away too much personal information that may allow people to do detailed research about you. You’ll also want to run a mile if anyone asks you for credit card details or money.

Here are some tips on how to stay safe during online dating:

Don’t give away your full name, address, place of work until you know someone well
Always meet in public places where you have phone signal
If you have any concerns about meeting someone for a date, inform a close friend of your whereabouts
Never give anyone any financial information
Do not be lured into lending money or investing into any schemes
If something feels ‘off’ about someone then trust your gut instinct and find a way to end the conversation or leave the date
Block and report any users that send offensive or inappropriate messages

Enjoyed this article? You may also find these articles useful: