Did you know that millennials take an average of four days to swap phone numbers with someone they’ve met online? If you’ve been busy with online dating searching for potential dates, you may be wondering when is the right time to swap numbers. Should you give your phone number out freely? Or is it better to wait until you’ve been chatting with someone for a while and preparing to meet in person? There are no hard and fast rules regarding when to swap numbers. However, there are a few things you may want to bear in mind.
1. Online dating: When to swap numbers depends on how comfortable you feel chatting to the person you’ve matched with
It may sound like common sense but it’s best to avoid swapping numbers with someone who you’ve literally just matched with. Take your time and exercise some caution before giving your personal number to a complete stranger. The reality is that the vast majority of matches will lead to nothing substantial. Chances are, you probably won’t even remember their names a year from now. Therefore it’s wise to give things some time before swapping phone numbers.
Your best bet is spending some time chatting on the online dating app or platform to get to know them a bit better first. Simple things like where they are from and what they do for a living are common first questions. Then you can delve into more personal questions to get a sense for their personality and interests. You can only gain limited information from chatting to someone on an online dating app but it’s better than nothing. At least if they say something that bothers you or sounds completely incompatible with what you want then you know it’s pointless swapping numbers.
Maybe you’ve been chatting regularly with someone you’ve met through online dating and have decided you’d like to get to know them better. If they seem respectful and like someone you can get along with you may feel comfortable swapping phone numbers with them. This way, you can continue chatting outside the online dating app with a view to meeting up in person.
2. Wait until you’re certain you want to meet up with this person before swapping phone numbers
Some people are more cautious than others when it comes to swapping numbers with someone they’ve met online. After all, giving your phone number allows the other person to contact you anytime. It’s harder to avoid someone contacting you even when you want to cut things off. A good policy is to chat with them on the online dating platform until you are sure you want to meet up with them in person. If you’re 50 50 about them in the initial stages of messaging then it seems pointless to give out your phone number. You can simply continue chatting with them until you make a decision about whether you want to meet. Swapping phone numbers is the next logical step in order for you to discuss making plans.
3. Swapping numbers with someone you’ve met from online dating puts you at greater risk if they turn out to be cray
Unfortunately some of the people you meet from online dating may turn out to be, well, cray. The vast majority of people you meet will be normal. However, it can be hard to tell from just messaging them and there is always a small risk that the person you’ve matched with is ‘odd’. Bearing this in mind, you may wish to only swap numbers with people that you’ve been chatting with for a while and things seem to be going well. At least you’ll have some sense of their character before giving out personal information like your phone number. Giving out your phone number also puts you at greater risk of harassment or even phone scams.
Related: Online Dating: How Long To Wait Before Meeting Up
4. If in doubt about swapping phone numbers, you can even use a second phone or a disposable phone number
Nowadays it’s simple enough to get a second phone number. Or, there are apps that can generate a disposable phone number for you. By having a separate phone number just for online dating, you can at least avoid giving out your primary phone number to strangers. Frankly, many of the people you match with or even meet up with for a first date won’t end up staying in your life for a very long time. Therefore, it’s perfectly reasonable to give them an alternative phone number.
5. Swapping phone numbers during online dating is not actually necessary
If the conversation between you and your match is going well and you are planning to meet up, it may not even be necessary to swap phone numbers. After all, most online dating apps have efficient messaging systems that allow you to instantly communicate. You can easily make plans and keep in touch. Of course, by not having their phone number, there is the risk that you cannot call each other if either of you are running late. However, if your match hasn’t mentioned swapping phone numbers and you are making plans on the app to meet up in person, that’s totally fine.
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