If you’re currently looking to meet someone and are contemplating using dating apps, you may be wondering: is online dating worth it? Perhaps you’ve already tried online dating in the past and had a mixed bag of experiences. Or, maybe you have been using online dating apps for a while and are yet to meet someone you truly click with.
Online dating can be a time-consuming process. If you’ve not found what you’ve been looking for, it’s hard to know whether it’s worthwhile continuing with online dating. Here, we evaluate the pros and cons of online dating to help you determine whether online dating is worth it for you.
Is online dating worth it? The Pros.
Convenience
The convenience of online dating is what attracts many people in the first place. Online dating can be done from the comfort of your own home at any time of the day. At the click of a button, you can have access to hundreds of singles in your area. People’s profiles already display their age, location and interests. In some respects, it’s far easier than going out to a social gathering or to a bar.
If you have a busy lifestyle that means you don’t have much time left to socialize, online dating can allow you to put yourself out there. For example, if you have a busy job that requires you to work very long hours, perhaps the last thing you feel like doing on a Friday night is going out to meet new people. Online dating can be a very quick and direct way of finding dates that involves less time and effort than meeting people in real life.
Meet people you wouldn’t ordinarily meet
Perhaps you are not the most sociable type and it’s hard for you to get out of your comfort zone to meet new people. Even if you are at a party, you may not find it easy to talk to someone new, even if you are curious about them. If you are shy, online dating can take away some of the challenges of getting to know new people.
Alternatively, you may have a wide circle of friends, but it may still be difficult to meet new people. Perhaps it’s always the same bunch of people you view them as friends only. In both situations, online dating exposes you to people you wouldn’t ordinarily meet in your daily life. This can be a great thing as sometimes you may find you click with someone who’s different to the people you usually hang out with.
Related: How To Do Online Dating Successfully: 5 Top Tips For Success
Is online dating worth it? The cons.
Many people you meet through online dating apps are not looking for anything serious
Online dating apps have gained somewhat of a reputation for being full of people looking for casual as opposed to serious relationships. Since you will often meet complete strangers, some people feel less accountable for their actions as they can easily just stop communicating (or even ghost) you. They will likely never bump into you again in real life.
Online dating attracts such a diverse range of people looking for different things. While there are certainly people looking for fun only, there are others who are open to a serious relationship. Many people approach online dating with an open mind without expectations. They are happy to meet people, go on dates and simple see how it goes.
Risk of being lied to, misrepresentation
It’s common for people to misrepresent themselves or even tell outright lies on their online dating profiles. This may range from changing their location or age, to even putting fake photos. They may lie about their relationship status, too. Unfortunately, it can be difficult to spot who is not telling the truth. Without having mutual friends or doing some serious research, you won’t be able to find out if someone has misrepresented themselves on their dating profile. Unfortunately, there are serious scammers out there.
It’s important to keep your wits about you and exercise caution during online dating. If someone you’ve matched with seems to have inconsistencies in what they tell you or something doesn’t seem quite right, listen to your gut instinct. Always meet someone you’ve met from online dating in a public place in the daytime, ideally. Inform a close friend where you will be. Don’t disclose too much personal information. This article has a list of precautions you can take to avoid being scammed.
You’ve tried online dating but click with no one
If you’re seriously looking for someone that you click with, it can be disheartening after you’ve been on a few dates with no potential. Unfortunately, this is just one of the realities of dating and is not specific to online dating. If you are looking for someone with serious relationship potential, it’s fair to assume that there will only be a handful of people who you will be compatible with. Many people will have experienced dating various different people before eventually finding someone they feel that special connection with.
Online interactions are completely different to meeting someone in real life
When you match with someone on an online dating app, you’ll initially exchange messages through the app or some other form of messaging. It’s possible to spend a significant amount of time messaging with this person, as you try and get to know them. Unfortunately, there is no substitute for meeting someone in real life. It’s possible to have interesting conversations online or on the phone. However, this is absolutely no guarantee that you’ll enjoy spending time with them in person. It’s only when you spend time with someone IRL that you feel their vibe and see their body language. It’s far easier to tell if someone’s your type in person than through messaging.
In some instances, people may spend a lot of time messaging and wondering if the person they’ve matched with is compatible with them. If it’s difficult to arrange a face to face meeting due to distance or other factors, you may finally meet up with them, only to be disappointed. On the other hand, if you’d met this person on a night out and exchanged a few words with them, you may be able to make a quicker decision about whether they are your type.
Online dating can be shallow
Online dating requires you to judge someone based on a few photos and limited information on their profile picture. This may be more shallow than say, meeting someone in real life through friends or common interests. You may overlook someone who has a great personality or common interests based on their profile picture. While it is undeniable that one’s appearance does play a part in attraction and compatibility, the truth is that we can end up clicking with people we didn’t expect to. Some even suggest that we don’t actually have a ‘type’ because the characteristics we find attractive can change over time.
It has even been suggested that due to the ‘swipe’ culture of online dating apps, one can underate someone’s attractiveness due to the sheer volume of profiles. Dating apps require you to choose potential matches based on a very quick judgment that doesn’t involve you even speaking to them in real life. Therefore, there is some scope to making errors in judgment.
Is online dating worth it? Well, it depends.
When it comes to online dating, there are certainly happy stories of people who have found what they are looking for through dating apps. On the other hand, there are also people who seem to never have any luck. There are even people who have been lied to or defrauded, unfortunately. Success in online dating comes down to having a positive attitude and luck but also exercising caution to ensure your own safety and protect yourself against dishonest people.
Online dating can absolutely be worth it if you are simply looking to meet individuals outside your social circle. Even if you match with someone and only end up meeting once or twice for a casual date, it can be a fun experience. In some cases, people may find matches that turn into long term relationships, or even marriage. Ultimately, it’s good to approach online dating with an open mind, but also beware of the risks and take the necessary steps to protect your safety.
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