Have you been ghosted by the guy you like because he had fears about being in a relationship with you? He may have told you that he was scared before he disappeared. Or, you may have figured this out on your own. If he failed to give you any meaningful explanation as to why he wanted to end things, this can be difficult to come to terms with. You might be thinking to yourself “he ghosted me because he was scared- what should I do?” Here’s everything you need to know.
People ghost for a variety of reasons. Often, people ghost because they are just not that into the person they’ve been seeing or chatting to. This is frequently the case on online dating apps or during casual dating. Usually, one person starts to lose interest and decides to ghost because they can’t be bothered to formally end things. However, there can be other somewhat more complex reasons, such as a guy having fears about the relationship. This can be confusing because, on one hand, you may be confident that he does have feelings for you. However, you may be very hurt by him ghosting you
Regardless of a guy’s reasons for ghosting, even if it’s out of him being scared to have a relationship with you, it is never a good thing to be ghosted. Sure, he may have legitimate reasons for being scared of getting involved with you. However, trying to figure out why exactly he was scared and what you can do it about it can be difficult.
Are you wondering “he ghosted me because he was scared, why?” Here are some reasons why a guy might be scared to be in a relationship with you
Reason 1. He fears commitment
Being in a relationship with someone often eventually leads to some level of commitment between the two people. This does not necessarily mean marriage, but many couples will eventually become boyfriend and girlfriend if they’ve been dating for a while. If this guy is scared of commitment, this may have made him fearful of continuing the relationship with you.
Reason 2. He is scared of becoming emotionally vulnerable
Over time, it’s only natural that two people who are dating will get to know each other intimately. This means learning about the other person’s personality and lifestyle but also their thoughts and dreams. It means opening up one’s emotional side and letting someone else in. It’s possible that this man is scared of becoming emotionally vulnerable and ghosted you to cut the relationship off.
Reason 3. He has had bad experiences in past relationships that make him fearful of being in a relationship with you
Has this guy has previously had negative experiences in relationships that left a bad taste in his mouth? If so, he may be scared of getting involved with you because he fears the same thing happening again. Anything from being cheated on to undergoing a difficult relationship breakup can cause a man to fear jumping into a new relationship.
Reason 4. He fears losing his freedom and independence
Sometimes when a man is scared of getting involved in a new relationship, it is because he fears losing his freedom and independence. He may view being in a relationship with you as something mutually exclusive to his freedom. When a man is completely single, he is able to do what he wants, whenever he wants. He is also able to date around and not get too emotionally involved.
Reason 5. He fears taking on the responsibility that comes with being in a relationship
When two people have been dating for a while, it’s only natural that they develop stronger feelings for each other. It’s common to start to care for each other without even realizing it. They may incorporate each other into their daily routines and help each other out with day-to-day tasks. Furthermore, they often become that “go to” person for each other, celebrating good times together as well as offering emotional support when times are hard. It’s arguable that being in a relationship with someone romantically does carry a degree of responsibility. If he’s not completely happy to embrace this, this may have caused him to be scared of continuing the relationship with you.
Related: 5 Telltale Signs He’s Acting Distant
No matter what this guy was scared of, it’s clear that he is not the right guy for you
If you’re in the situation where you’re thinking to yourself “he ghosted me because he was scared” and feeling conflicted or confused, this is understandable. You may have had a great time with this guy. Furthermore, you may be certain that he has strong feelings for you. If you still like him, it may be tempting to find explanations for his behaviour. You might even be trying to justify his actions and tell yourself that it’s not really his fault that he ghosted you.
Realistically, if he ghosted you because he was scared then yes, it’s arguable that he may not have intentionally meant to hurt you. If it was genuinely because he feared being in a relationship with you, it’s absolutely possible that he does really like you. However, even if he does have strong feelings for you, the fact that he ghosted you shows that he does NOT want to be in a relationship with you. Even if the two of you like each other, it will be very difficult to be in a relationship with a man who (for whatever reason) is scared or conflicted about being with you.
The harsh reality is that he is gone
It really sucks to be ghosted by the guy that you like. If you’re thinking to yourself “he ghosted me because he was scared,” you may feel empathy towards him because you still care. However, the reality is that he is gone. Even if he has feelings for you, he does not have the capacity to be in a relationship with you. Furthermore, he has proven himself to be unreliable and unwilling to communicate with you. Your best bet is accepting the reality that this guy does not want to be in a relationship with you and moving on.
Related: Here’s How To Apply The No Contact Rule After Being Ghosted
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