Been ghosted on Bumble? You’re certainly not alone. While ghosting can happen in established relationships, it is especially common when using apps such as Bumble for dating. The process of matching with prospects is similar to Tinder. Most people will end up with a handful of people they’ve matched with. You may be excited to start up a conversation with a cute guy or girl. However, those not new to Bumble will know from experience that initial small talk may simply lead to, well, nothing. Unfortunately, as you continue swiping on Bumble, getting ghosted on Bumble is likely something you will just get used to.
What is ghosting on Bumble?
Ghosting is when someone completely stops communicating with you without any explanation. With the loss of conversation, the ‘relationship’ is assumed to be over. Ghosting on Bumble is very common. Perhaps someone you’d matched with initially seemed keen and you were getting to know each other. You may have even made plans to meet. However, they unexpectedly stopped writing all together, leaving you wondering whether you’d been ghosted.
Ghosting on Bumble can occur during the initial stages soon after you’ve matched. A typical ghosting scenario on Bumble is when you’ve just matched. You may be exchanging casual messages to get to know each other. This may then develop into somewhat more detailed conversation where you may learn about each other’s lifestyles, background etc. You may be keen to get to know this person and wonder if they’ll ask you out in person. Unfortunately, despite their initial ‘interest,’ their enthusiasm for messaging you tails off. Eventually, they stop replying all together and that’s that. You’ve been ghosted.
Related: Why Is Online Dating So Hard?
Common: getting ghosted soon after matching
Being ghosted soon after matching with someone on Bumble is likely to happen to most users at some point. Chances are, you may have even ghosted someone yourself on Bumble. Frankly speaking, many people use dating apps such as Bumble with few expectations, seeing it as a bit of fun. Some people have absolutely no intention of taking it any further than some flirty conversation with a cute stranger. Furthermore, the sheer volume of matches people end up with makes it impossible to keep up with everyone. One needs to narrow their selection down at some point. As everyone is simply playing the same game, there is no obligation to explain that they are no longer interested. Therefore, ghosting is almost to be expected at this stage.
Less common: getting stood up
Getting ghosted on Bumble is far more of an issue if it’s after they’ve made plans to meet you. Maybe you’d made plans to meet and now the day is arriving. When you reach out to confirm that your plans are still on, they do not respond. It’s getting late and they still haven’t replied. Are you supposed to assume it’s on or off? Should you make other plans? Or, even worse, you’ve shown up at the agreed time and place and they’ve actually stood you up.
“It was enough to put me off online dating for a while.”
“I’ve been ghosted on Bumble a couple of times. The most annoying time was when this guy suggested meeting for drinks after work and he even confirmed it with me two days prior. When I showed up at the bar, he was nowhere to be seen and I didn’t have his phone number. I messaged him several times asking if he was coming but no reply. I was really angry that he would just not show up like that. Surely he could have just cancelled the plans earlier instead of wasting my time like that. Thankfully that only happened once! It was enough to put me off online dating for a while.” –Jan, 28.
Related: How To Do Online Dating Successfully: 5 Top Tips For Success
How to deal with being ghosted on Bumble?
If you’ve been ghosted on Bumble, whether it was during the initial stages of chatting, or whether you actually got stood up, the way you deal with it is the same. Basically, you have to move on. It may be tempting to dwell on the reasons why they ghosted you. The reality is that you will most likely never know why they ghosted you. However, this is unlikely to help you. You have no idea what this person is looking for, their reasons for using Bumble, or whether they are even single. You are far better off accepting that a person who ghosted you has nothing to offer you.
It’s understandably infuriating if you got stood up after they had agreed to meet you in person. Given that it has already happened, your only option is to forget about them. You may be keen to send them a final message to express your annoyance at being stood up. In this case, it’s reasonable to say: “Surely you could have cancelled the plans in advance, rather than me wasting my time showing up. It’s obvious you lack even basic decency and manners. It’s certainly for the best that we are no longer speaking as I do not have time for this kind of behaviour.”
How do I avoid getting ghosted on Bumble?
Unfortunately, there is no guaranteed way to ensure you will not be ghosted on Bumble. When one uses dating apps, they are dealing with many unknowns. Though most people do provide real information on their profiles, there are others who use fake personal details or even fake photos. Furthermore, you do not know what people are truly looking for on Bumble. Some may be seeking their next girlfriend, whereas others may be looking for a bit of fun on the side.
I got ghosted on Bumble. Should I give up on online dating?
Even if you have had a bad experience being ghosted on Bumble, this is by no means an indication that online dating is not for you. Everyone has had their share of good and bad experiences in dating, both online and offline. While there are some rude time wasters who may stand you up, there are also some who are sincere and want to genuinely get to know you. If you’ve been ghosted, try not let it get you down. They did not value you and it was obviously not meant to be. There are other people out there who are far more suited to you. By putting it in the past, you’ll be able to approach new relationships with an open mind.
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